What the Countries really want to say to America
by ezmonee6
Summary: Have you ever wondered what the countries big and small want to say to America? Well now you get to know. Warning: Language, historical subjects, touchy subjects and just an over abundance of pissed off or allied countries to America.
1. Vietnam

A woman in a green dress is shoved into a room. By a man with a black hoodie to hide his face. She looks around the room and sees a metal desk and chair. She notices a dark screen as well on one of the longer walls. She taps it and finds out it is glass.

"Please sit." A voice said coming from the intercom.

The lady sat on the cold chair. The voice coming from the intercom.

"Country name."

"What?" She said

"Tell us your country name."

"Vietnam, and how did you know I was a country?"

"That is classified."

Vietnam pouted in her chair waiting for the voice to speak again.

"Now, Vietnam, we have brought you here for one thing, tell us how you feel about America."

"Wait, what do you want me to do?"

"Say what you really want to say to America."

"Really? You are letting me do that?"

"Yes. We have a camera on the other side of the glass so please say what you want to say about America."

"Is he going to see this?"

"That is classified."

"Again with the classified bullshit! I have half a mind to throw the chair into that glass!"

"Do it and we will electrocute you."

Vietnam stopped and changed her mood very quickly.

"Fine, I will talk about America."

"Good you can start at any time."

"America, you are one of the most annoying countries I have ever met. You are loud and obnoxious, and you claim to be a hero when really you are one of the biggest jerks in the world. You attacked Cuba and backed out the second you were losing. You force capitalism down other countries throats. You invaded Iraq and only found the country capable of making weapons and not the weapons themselves. And probably your biggest blunder, invading me. Your agent orange is still effecting my people today. Oh and one more thing stop bringing me catfish every time we meet. I have enough of them and I will hit you with my oar if you do it again. And that, America is what I think about you."

Vietnam felt relief after saying that. Complaining to someone about America felt very good.

"Okay, thank you Vietnam."

"Great, can I go now?"

"Yes you can go."

Vietnam left the room with a smile on her face.

The man in the control room took stopped recording for a minute to have some coffee.

After he was done he said to the masked man. "Okay bring in the next one."


	2. Russia

A tall man wearing a scarf enters the room with a very intimidating smile. The man in the hoodie held the door open for him, trembling as the taller man walked into the room.

"Thank you." The man with the scarf said.

The hooded man closed the door as soon as the other man was well away from the door.

The voice from the intercom sounded as Russia was tapping on the glass.

"Sit down, please."

"Thank you comrade."

"Country name if you would."

"Russia and how did you-"

"Classified information."

"You will tell me da?"

Russia then proceeded to take out his pipe and swing it at the glass window.

"Eh, why did it not brake?"

"Because it is made with some of the hardest material known to man. Now sit down or face the wrath of a hundred and one shocks to the groin."

Russia sat down before any of that happened.

"Okay, now, you were brought here for a specific reason."

"Hmm."

"We want you to tell us how you really feel about America."

"Oh I will gladly tell you how I feel about America."

"Okay start when ever you like."

"America is the land of the brave. Not really, they are bigger cowards than Latvia da. America is afraid of other nations despite being called the one most progressive nations out there. He is a coward when it comes to many things like scary movies and me. He and I have had some trouble in the past and it is not behind us. He is still a wimp, we can beat him in many winter sports without cheating, and he has been trying to get rid of my bosses for a long time. And good luck trying to put up a wall with Mexico. I tried that wall thing once and it didn't work. Also stop giving me your shitty vodka. We have our own and it is much better. That is what I have to say to America."

"Alright, thank you, you can leave now."

"Wait, I have one more thing to say."

"What."

"Will you become one with me?"

"No."

And after that Russia shrugged it off and left.

"It's days like this that I wonder why I quit drinking. Bring in the next one."


	3. Switzerland

A short blond man with a gun can in kicking and screaming and was put down in the chair by the hooded man. The blond guy took out his gun and shot at the hooded man.

The voice over the intercom came on and said. "Take his gun! Take his gun!"

The guard launched himself on the blond man and struggled to take his gun away.

After around five minutes, the guard seized the gun and left.

"Let me out of here!"

This country was going ballistic.

"Nope, not until you finished what you came here for."

"Let me out of here right now and I did not volunteer for this, you sickos kidnapped me and my sister!"

"While that is true we will let you go as long as you help us finish the project."

The country got up from his chair, pulled out another gun and tried to shoot at the glass but the bullet came back.

"Bulletproof glass. Still want to escape."

The country was very annoyed but sat back down in his chair.

"Fine."

"Good now tell us your country name."

"Switzerland."

"Okay, now, we want you to tell us what you really want to say to America."

"Will I get paid money for this?"

"No."

The nation looked annoyed with the people behind the glass.

"Whatever."

"Okay, go whenever you are ready."

"America you are one annoying country. Your food is bigger than it needs to be and you're half way to getting a heart attack. I will, however, say that you are completely bad. Your sports teams are good enough and you are a challenge in the Olympics, and you know how to respect my boundaries... kind of. But you are still trying manipulate countries with promises you know you can't keep and have never been neutral in world affairs. Also if you ask me one more time if I have been in Germany's asshole, I will hit you in the head with my peace prize! And yes I know that it is ironic. That is all I have to say."

"Okay you can go."

"Finally."

He left out the door with a very angry stature.

"New rule everyone, no weapons in the interview room. And guard search everyone we have for weapons. And bring the next one in." The man who controlled the interviews said as he popped an Asprin into his mouth knowing this will be a long day.


	4. Hungary

A woman wearing a maid-like outfit come is pushed into the metal room.

"Hello, is anyone there? That guy took my frying pan and I would like it back."

A voice from an intercom came booming out.

"You will get your frying pan in due time, but for now please take a seat."

The woman took a seat in the metal chair. When she sat down, her face went from confused to uncomfortable.

"This chair is cold. Do you have one that isn't metal?"

"No, deal with it."

The woman pouted in her chair and slumped down.

"Country name please."

"Hungary."

"Good, now, I want you to tell us how you really feel about America."

"If it gets me out of here faster and gives me my frying pan back then I will tell you how I really feel."

"Okay start at any time."

"America is an alright nation. He's good at swimming I guess. He is not as big of an annoyance as Prussia. But all of that can not undo what he didn't do in the past. I asked for help in the late 1940s and early 1950s but he didn't bring anything to me because he said I had nothing to offer in return. I can not believe he said that doesn't he know I was susceptible to communism, and he said that no nation is unimportant! He gave it to many other countries but I guess I was the exception! God I hate him for that! But I have calmed down and it is fine between us, politically, but I want the 2024 Summer Olympics. Also tell him to stop France from looking at Austria. I know we broke up but I still care for Austria. And that is my piece on America."

"Okay."

"Can I go now and get my frying pan?"

"Sure."

Hungary left with a cheer and slammed the door shut.


	5. Japan

A man in a Japanese naval uniform was escorted into the metal room by the hooded security guard. As the door shut, he sit down at the table and waited for something to happen.

The voice from the intercom came on.

"Sit down please."

"But I am already sitting, was I not suppose to until you said so."

"Uh, no, you are fine, but I would like to know your country name, and before you ask how I know you are a country, it is classified information so please don't ask the question."

"Yes, of course. I am Japan."

"Okay, now, you are here to say what you really want to say about America."

"I am to talk about American-san? In what context?"

"Yes you are to talk about America and there is no context, you can be as positive or negative as you want."

"Okay."

"You can start at any time."

"America-san is a good friend and ally. He is very nice and almost always positive. I haven't seen him in a positive mood for a while. But I do hope he has his regular attitude back when what ever he is upset about is over. America-san hasn't always been my friend. In fact he detonated two bombs on my lower half but that has been resolved. He also tried to get me to come out of my shell, which worked. He may not seem as though he is very kind but he does these things for a reason. Also he has very interesting food colored in neon and I would like to take more pictures if you would allow me to. And that is how I feel about America."

"Okay, Japan, you may go."

"Can I please have my katana back?"

"Yes we were going to give it back anyways."

"Thank you."

Japan bowed and left out the door.

 _Nicest one so far._ The man who was in charge of this project thought. "Bring the next one in."


	6. France

There was a ruckus outside the door. Screaming could be heard from the guard. The door opened and a long haired man with blond locks and blue eyes was thrown into the room, but he came right back to the door and the guard had to push him back in all the way. But the man jumped on the guard to take him down. The guard threw him off his back and into the wall.

"Stay the hell in here you freak!"

"But _mon cher_ we could make such beautiful music together."

"No thanks buddy but I am happily asexual." Slamming the door in his face.

"Americans, how rude." He sat down at the table.

"Country name please." The voice coming from the intercom said.

" _On hon hon_ , who is that sexy voice and where is it coming from?"

"Just answer the question."

"I am France, and I would like to know where I am, why I am here, and would you like to go somewhere after this is done."

"You are here to talk about your real thoughts on America, where you are is classified and I will not go anywhere with you and if you ask that again your crotch will be receiving a thousand volts of electricity."

France looked down at his crotch and cringed.

"Fine I will tell you how I really feel about America."

"Start at any time."

"America is a sexy country I will say that. I have been wanting to get into his pants for a while now. He helps me out whenever he can and he helped me build my country up from World War two. His kindness is like no other. But I do have some issues with the American. Mainly his choice in wardrobe it is very tacky and very uninspired. His women wear far too much makeup and are very stupid looking. I do not like the way he forgets Canada. He is your neighbor treat him as such. But I like him more now because he helps with all of my crisis's that have happened. So in conclusion, I want him to F*ck me, and I want to F*ck him, and I want to feel the sweat of our naked bodies together as we lie in a bed with satin sheets as I kiss him and stick my fingers in his-"

"That's enough! Get him out!"

The hooded guard came in and did not have to struggle to take France out.

"Ooh la la, I love being man handled."

The door closed with a bang.

 _I am going to need a bunch of aspirins and some therapy after that._ Thought the person running this thing. Popping in another aspirin. "Bring out the next one."


	7. Canada

A man with blond hair, blue-violet eyes and glasses came into the room with a polar bear cub by his side. He sat down in the chair patiently waiting for something to happen.

The intercom came on with nothing for a few seconds and then this happened.

SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEECH!

The sound was so deafening that it caused the man and the bear to cover there ears.

"AHHHHHH! THAT NOISE!" The man screamed at the top of his lungs.

The screeching finally stopped and a voice came on.

"Sorry, sorry my hand knocked one of the dials. Sorry for making you scream like that. Anyways what is your country name?"

"Wait you can see me and hear me?"

"Yes, I can. The room you're in isn't exactly soundproof and it is a one way glass."

"Oh."

"Now can I have your name?"

"I-I-I'm Canada."

"Okay, so you are here today to tell us what you really want to say to America."

Canada's face looked like it was lightening up after hearing that.

"You can start when ever you like."

"America, you have been such an asshole to me for so long that I have let myself think that I am actually a ghost. You are no hero as much as you would like to think it. You forget I even exist, threw baseballs at me until I cried, make me deal with everyone you piss off, and you dragged me into everything you like all so that you can get a sick laugh at me failing it. Oh and that doesn't even begin where I am at with you. You say you are the most progressive country in the world, yeah right coward. All of my citizens have free health care, we got rid of guns and crime is at an all time low, we legalized gay marriage eleven years before you did, we actually let people who are trying to escape war in their country into mine, and my people can drink when they are nineteen. So really I am the most progressive. Take that you lazy, McDonald's eating, d*ck sucking-"

Canada looked at Kumajiro who was cowering in the corner at the sight of his owner on a power high. Canada decided to turn it down a notch.

"Sorry I lost my temper there. But like I was saying a while ago, while I do hold America in low regards, I do care about and I do hope he cares about me."

There was silence until a very shocked voice over the intercom came through.

"O-O-O-Okay, you can leave."

"Thank you. Come on Kumajiro."

"Who are you?"

"Do we have to have this talk again?"

The door closed as soon as they were out.


	8. Ukraine

**Hey guys, sorry I have been taking forever with this stuff it is just that I was finishing finals and getting over a stomach bug. But I am here now so let's start this.**

The guard escorted a woman with big boobs and short hair into the metal room. She looked as though she had been crying. The guard left and the woman took a seat and started to tear up again

 _Better go easy on her._ The person in charge of this operation thought in their head, taking a sip of their coffee. They turned on the intercom and spoke softly and calmly to the woman.

"Hello miss, can you please tell me your country name."

"U-Ukraine."

"Okay, are there any questions you want to ask?"

"Just three. What do you want from me? Where are we? And why are all of the countries locked up in one big room with dog collars around their necks?"

"You are in a classified location, the collars are so they don't escape and we want you to tell us how you really feel about America."

"Okay, will I be able to leave once I give my peace on America?"

"Yes you will."

Ukraine sighed and wiped the water from her eyes. "Okay I will tell you my feelings about America."

"Okay you can start whenever you want."

"America is very, very, very annoying. In world meetings he comes up with plans that are very illogical. He is very mean to my little brother but I can understand why because of...recent events. And America has been by my side ever since the soviet union collapsed. He and many other countries helped me when Chernobyl exploded. He is kind in some ways and is trying to make the planet better in some ways, but I am worried that fear will consume his and all of our country's people and we can no longer trust anyone. He is a symbol of hope and a symbol of fear. Also... can you tell him to stop looking at my chest at the world meetings, it makes me want to cry. And to also not ask me to wear my country's school uniform. I guess that is my peace on America."

"Okay, thank you for your time, our guard will escort you out."

"You are welcome." Ukraine left the room and as the door shut the person behind the mic relaxed.

"I thought she'd never leave. Bring on the next one."


	9. Belarus and Something Else

There was fighting coming from outside the door. It sounded like a cat was fighting a washing machine. When the door opened up a girl in what looked like a maids outfit was wrestling the guard. The girl was pulling the guard's hair from his head while he was trying to get her off. When he got her off of his head she had a clump of brown hair in her hand. The guard saw this and bolted from the room. The girl was now madder than she was before and started breaking everything in the room. So the man in charge thought it would be a good time to use the imbedded Tasers in the room to give her a good shock. He flipped the switch and the electricity started flowing through the room and into the girl. She started to shake and clamp up. After thirty second of shocking her the man in charge stopped. Another person came into the room. It was the second in command of this operation, Douglas. Douglas came up to the man in charge.

"Hey chief, is that the next one?"

"Yep."

"Did she break the table and chair?"

"Yep."

"But they are made of titanium."

"I know, Douglas, I know."

"And that was the last one we have at the base."

"I did not know that."

"I can order another one but it won't be here for another day."

"Alright so after this one we go on a little break. Douglas would you like to join me on my break?"

"Yes sir." Douglas planted a kiss on the cheek of the man in charge.

The president was about to kiss right back when the girl started to wake up.

"She is waking up. I will be back with a kiss later."

He turns on the intercom.

"So, you calm now."

The country turned away and scoffed.

"I will take that as a yes. Now tell me your country name."

"Belarus, and why do you have me here?"

"We want you to tell us how you feel about America."

"If my big brother doesn't like him, then I don't like him."

There was a moment of complete silence.

"That's it?"

"Yes."

"Okay, I guess you can leave."

"Will I get my knife back?

"Yes."

"Thank you."

Belarus left with not another word.

"Guard."

"Yes."

"Keep all of the others on lock down. We are going on break and I don't want them to leave prematurely."

The man in charge planted a kiss on Douglas's cheek and left the control room with him.


	10. England

**Author's notes: Hey guys I am back. I am sorry that I have not been around recently but when you have school and family things to deal with you usually have no time for your hobbies. So I have decided to update on Saturdays or when I am not busy. I hope this seems fair.**

 _"_ Oh my god, I am glad to be back." Said the leader who was back from his extended break. "Douglas, next time we go on a trip, make sure you check the weather first."

"That hurricane snuck up on us and you know it." Douglas said as he and the leader came into the command center.

"Yes and I also know it was your job to check the weather each day."

"Oh you are just mad that we had to stay in the airport for two weeks."

The two of them went into the control room with cups of coffee and turned on all of the equipment. The leader turned around and sat on the desk with his back facing the bulletproof glass.

"While that is true I am even more mad that you cried when we were in the bedroom."

"It was my first time. What do you want?"

"Oh I don't know, maybe someone who thought about using an en*ma!"

"I said I was sorry right."

"Yeah but I am pretty sure the staff weren't."

"Yeah, alright, seeing house keeping have to take the mattress out was funny."

"I can't believe I had to makeup that excuse that you were drunk."

A third voice came into this conversation coming from the room on the opposite side of the glass from a blond, bushy eye browed, green eyed country.

"Um... Hello... gents... your microphone is on and... I've heard everything."

An embarrassed leader took his hand off the intercom button and tried to straighten himself out while Douglas just slowly walked out of the room.

"Oh um...sorry. Now, can you say your country name?"

"Oh yes sorry. I am England and the representative for all of Great Britain."

"Okay now what I need to know is how you really feel about America."

"You want me to talk about America?"

"Yes, please."

The country sighed. "Alright."

"America was like my little brother. Hell, he still is like my little brother. I mean we have gotten into our fair share of fights, but that is normal for brothers. I mean I guess I had a case of empty nest syndrome trying to get him back and I really had not come to fully accept him as a mature grown up country until the first world war. Ever since then he and I have become close again. I really do wish he would visit more often. And I will admit, even though I give him crap about his fast food, is In-and-Out burgers are really good. But that being said he has a habit of speaking without thinking, especially in the meetings. I do wish that he would think first and speak later. So yeah that is all I really have to say."

"Okay Great Britain, you are allowed to leave."

"Thank you and I will pretend I never heard a thing." And with that he left.

 _Man, that guy was kind off cute. He was blushing throughout the interview._ The leader thought after the interview. He took a sip of his coffee and looked to see who was next.


	11. Italy and Romano

Two men that looked as though they were of Mediterranean blood came in but in very contrasting ways. The red headed one with the slightly lighter skin and curl on the left side of his head came in sweetly and with out hassle. But the one with brown hair, slightly darker skin, and a curl on the right side of his head came in kicking and screaming. The guard had to literally handcuff him to the chair.

The leader of this project called for the guard into the room.

"Okay, guard, why are there two of them?"

"They represent the same country, sir."

"Okay, but why do they?"

"I don't know Italian politics, sir."

"Okay, so I have to deal with two Italians? Well there goes one question out the window."

"They distinguish themselves to others by using the names Veneziano and Romano."

"Okay so just ask them that then? That will be easy. You can go now."

"Yes sir."

The guard left and the man in charge turned his attentions back to the two Italians.

"Okay you two, I already know you are Italians, but I would like to know who is Veneziano and who is Romano."

The red head raised his hand and started to speak in a very cheerful voice. "I am Veneziano and this is my big brother Romano. I'm the North of Italy and he is the South of Italy. Say hi Romano."

"I am not saying anything to these burger bastards."

 _Burger bastards?_ The leader thought confusedly.

"Do I need to give you a hug again?" Veneziano then gave his handcuffed brother a giant hug with Romano struggling like a fish out of water.

"Get away from me bastard."

"Um... can I please tell you why you are here?"

"Why should I let a bastard who won't even show his own face tell me what to do?"

"Because I hold the key to freedom and one thousand volts of electricity."

Romano just looked pissed. "Fine."

"It is very simple, all you have to do is tell us your feelings about America."

Veneziano looked as though he was happy to oblige. "You hear that bro, we can get out of here if we say something about America."

"Fine, whatever, you start."

Veneziano started right after cheering for a while.

"America is a nice guy, so friendly and pushes his ideas down your throat. He makes alright food but nothing can beat my pasta. He and I have had trouble in the past, but that is all behind us now. I don't get what he means by we need more robots, or when he says stuff like lit or ghetto. He let immigrants from my country into his for a long time. He is like that nation who is like the Germany of the America's. I think that is all I really have to say."

"Okay, Italy, you are excused."

"Pasta!" He left the room with out another thought.

Romano looked as though he was going to burst. "Don't just leave me here you bastard."

"Romano your turn."

"Fine whatever. America you are a wart on society you burger bastard! Loud and annoying is all you are! I hope you get it up the butt from all the other countries here one day! That is all I have to say."

"Okay, guard, get him out of the handcuffs."

The guard came in and got him out of his handcuffs and as soon as he was free he left.

 _Lets just hope I don't have to deal with two people again._ The leader thought. "Bring in the next one."


	12. Cuba

**Okay so I have decided that I want you guys to suggest who you want me to next. And that once I get all of the countries that have been personified in the show that I will be doing the other ones that haven't. That is right all one hundred and ninety-seven countries will be personified. And yes I am counting Taiwan...and Palestine...sue me!**

An muscular man with short brown dreads came into the room wearing a flower print shirt that you would see on dads going to Hawaii, complete with brown cargo shorts and sandals. The guard was forcing him in there with as much strength as possible but the man was putting up a good fight. The man in charge of the operation was watching intrigued behind the safety of the glass. And then something that was not expected happened...the man judo flipped the guard and pinned him down. The leader was enjoying this tussle but he knew what had to happen. So he turned on the electric security system and it shocked the both of them into unconscienced bliss.

After about five minutes later, they started to wake up. The guard hightailed it out of the room and locked it. The man was getting up and sitting on the chair. Then the man came on the intercom.

"What is your countries name?"

"Cuba and what the hell is going on?"

"What is going on is that you and the other countries were brought here to give your true feelings on America."

Cuba looked like he was going to run and he did to the locked door begging for someone to let him out.

"Please! Let me out I don't want to!"

"You will not be let out because I want you to say your feelings and be honest, then I will let you out."

Cuba stopped for a moment and sighed. He sat back down on his chair.

"Okay, well, I don't hate America anymore. I used to but he really is not that terrible. I mean sure I was a little annoyed when he put an embargo on me, but looking back on it now, I deserved it. That still doesn't mean I like him. He is still an annoyance at meetings and he still makes Canada take the front of the blame when ever he gets into trouble. He will not stop talking and it's really annoying. I wish that his attitude was more like Canada's. Also America you need to stop bringing fast food to meetings, not everyone likes the smell of fast food in the morning. I think that is all I really need to say."

"Okay, guard you can open the door, he can leave."

"Thank you for your time."

Cuba left after that.

 _No fast food during a meeting. I am going to have to make that a rule after this is over._ The leader thought to himself.

Douglas came in to see the progress.

"Hey baby."

"Hey Douglas."

"Was that the last country?"

"No, I have one hundred and eighty-four to go."

"Okay tell me when you are ready for that break."

Douglas planted a kiss on the leader's cheek and left.

 _I love being with him._


	13. Finland

**Hey guys...sorry, it has been a while since I posted a new chapter. I forgot for a while and then I remembered that I have this and I am super sorry that I have not updated. Also I do not condone country shaming because other countries have feelings too.**

A repair man had came out of the interview room and went up to the person in charge. "Okay, Mr..."

The chief chuckled and said. "Please call me chief everyone does."

The repair man started back up again. "Okay, chief, well your interview room has been fixed. I can not believe you had black mold in there."

"Neither can we. Thank you for tearing down those walls and that ceiling."

"No problem. So what are we doing for pay?"

"Here is my number. Call me we need to get back in the room and start what we were doing again. So can it wait?"

"I don't know."

"I will bring booze."

"Deal."

A man of short stature walks into the room. The man has blond hair and blue eyes. He is wearing a military like suit in a light turquoise color. He is also wearing brown boots. He was also carrying a tiny white dog. He seemed very cheery.

"Name of country please."

"Hello, I am Finland and this is Hanatamago." He said pointing to the dog.

"Okay, so, here is the deal. I will let you leave if you tell us your true feelings on America."

"Alright."

"Okay then, you can start whenever."

"America is very fun to be around. He is always laughing at my jokes and he always thanks me for giving him presents on Christmas. At one point I found him with Sweden and I told France and England about him so while I know he existed I couldn't even get to him before they did. But I do wish that he would not be as loud as he is in the world meetings, he talks over everyone. I really don't have much to say about him."

"Okay, you may leave."

"Thank you." He turn and left the room with his dog.

"That was rather easy. Okay bring in the next one."


End file.
